It has everything to do with Derek but in a completely different way.
If there’s one thing we’ve all learned about both Ellen Pompeo and her Grey’s Anatomy character Meredith Grey over the course of her 19 years on the show, it’s that they’re both strong as hell.
Considering all the hardships Grey has had to overcome to keep her career, family, and friendships on track, we can only applaud her dedication.
Ellen Pompeo has always been the biggest proponent of showing Meredith Grey in the rawest and most realistic way, letting the age and stress of the job show on her face and making the character make some very bad decisions.
Although television has a tendency to sugarcoat the lives of its main characters, Grey’s Anatomy was never about that.
She was not always happy with what Meredith did, nor was she supportive of every idea presented to her. But the actress always gave her best performance, and Meredith’s heartaches always managed to reach the hearts of the viewers.
Like the famous “Pick me” scene, which not only brought tears to the eyes of the audience but also to Pompeo herself. But for two very different reasons.
While viewers felt deeply for Meredith and were forced to remember all the similar situations that may have occurred in their own lives, the actress was disappointed in her character’s motives.
That’s what she told Variety in an interview with co-star Katherine Heigl:
“I fought that speech so hard. That’s another really interesting thing about life — some things that I was so against, and I was like, “I can’t beg a man on TV! This is so embarrassing.” And then it turns out to be one of the most famous scenes ever. […] In the scene, I’m crying, but I’m really crying because I have to beg a man on television.”
Whether or not the moment felt disparaging to Meredith in Pompeo’s mind, that’s not how viewers read the scene. Though like many other iconic TV moments, this one became a meme years later, it felt right in the episode and showed how much Meredith actually cares about Derek and their relationship.
If you want to re-watch Grey’s Anatomy and refresh your memory of Meredith and Derek’s love story, you can stream the show online on Netflix, Hulu, or ABC.