Of course, Rachel Leviss isn’t on the new season of Vanderpump Rules following her controversial affair with Tom Sandoval. However, she is very much still in the mix as she continues to share her side of the story on her podcast. Now, she’s talking about whether she has any sort of future with Tom, how she needs to make amends with Ariana, and her plans regarding consuming the new season.
Rachel debuted on Vanderpump Rules in 2016. She launched her podcast, Rachel Goes Rogue, this year where she talks mostly about the affair with Tom and how she feels about being on the show. More recently, LVP has even expressed disappointment in her for not returning to the show in some capacity to put an end to the scandal from last season.
Now, according to Just Jared, she recently had this to say on her podcast.
“If I didn’t reach out to him one day or two days, he would be upset by it and really kind of take out his frustration on me. So it made me feel like I had a responsibility to maintain his emotional needs.”
She also says that she did not have access to her cellphone and had to use a landline.
She continued, “And, oh man, the amount of times that Tom called me ‘selfish’ while I was in The Meadows and [said I was] ‘running away from my problems’ and I’m ‘depending on this place that’s basically an assisted living facility’ — you k now, like really guilt-tripping me and saying that I left him to deal with all the fodder, I’m just running.”
She went on to say that there was no way they could ever be friends again.
According to PEOPLE, she also talked about her relationship with Ariana, especially after seeing the season premiere of the show. In particular, she talked about the fact that she continued to communicate with Tom after initially apologizing to her.
Rachel said, “It was hard to see because I’m in a different place than I was back then. It’s a weird time warp when you’re watching a show like this and living one reality in that moment, and then, months later when the episodes air, you’re living in another reality, but you’re also reliving those moments that they captured on camera. And so it’s a nod to my younger self who was still in love and infatuated.”
She continued, “I feel like, with my apology that I made at the reunion, I had all the right intentions, and I was extremely sorry. But there’s another part of an apology, which is your actions afterward — they have to align with what you’re saying. And by sending him letters and being in contact for a good amount of time, I still want to take this time now to apologize again because I am in a different place than I was back then, and I can see things a lot clearer now.”
Rachel then says, “I got emotional watching that. You know, like, I recognized that my behavior was so hurtful to her.”
Additionally, sources have told TMZ that she plans to continue watching the show because she wants to know how they’ll talk about her.