His wife was no better the whole time.
Throughout Grey’s Anatomy’s long run, there have been plenty of questionable couples that viewers have raised their eyebrows at. No matter how incompatible two characters seemed or how awful they were to each other, the writers took it upon themselves to create the craziest pairings imaginable.
One of the worst examples of relationships was shown at the very beginning of the series, with Derek Shepherd and his then-wife Addison. However, as much as fans were ready to jump on Derek for cheating on his legal wife with Meredith, as the years went by, it became clearer that he wasn’t really in the wrong.
Sometimes time brings a much-needed fresh perspective on things, and in this situation, time helped the audience identify a real villain behind the crumbling marriage. It turned out to be Addison all along.
To understand this, you really have to put yourself in Derek’s shoes. Imagine being happily married and having some great friends, only to find out that your spouse is having an affair with your best friend. That alone would be enough for anyone to pack up, move on, and never look back.
Derek wasn’t ready to move on to another relationship, and that’s understandable. When you enter into a marriage, you make a commitment to love and care for someone for the rest of your life. Going through a betrayal like that leaves a lot of scars on your soul, and he was clearly dealing with them when he met Meredith.
What was supposed to be a one-night stand turned into a working relationship, and Addison’s comeback with a whole bunch of gaslighting and manipulation did not help Derek make peace with his thoughts. The love triangle they found themselves in was messy, that’s for sure, but it wouldn’t be nearly as bad if Addison didn’t try to minimize what she did.
Just like real life, Grey’s Anatomy is full of complex characters, who are mostly good but deeply flawed people. Neither Derek nor Addison reacted perfectly to each other, but putting the blame for a divorce on someone who was cheated on is too much, no matter what the situation.
If you are interested in what drama Grey’s Anatomy has in store for its viewers in the upcoming 20th season, keep an eye out for more news and updates to not miss a release date!