Alexa PenaVega wasn’t interested in dancing around drama.
The Spy Kids alum shared more insight into how she and her husband Carlos PenaVega navigated their experience competing alongside one another on Dancing With the Stars early on in their marriage.
“We literally said, ‘We don’t know how spouses do this show without doing it the way we did,’” Alexa, who wed the Big Time Rush member in 2014, reflected on the Nov. 3 episode of the Sex, Lies, and Spray Tans with Cheryl Burke podcast. “We fully understood the dynamics of the show but if Carlos was doing this and I was watching this girl dance with them all close and the rehearsals or whatever, it would be so hard.”
“Carlos, at that season of his life, he was such a jealous man that even though he understood the dynamic, it was still hard for him,” she continued. “It is incredibly flirty. We had to set big boundaries right off the bat, which was super hard for everyone around us. It’s like super flirty backstage and whatever.”
For the 36-year-old, who placed sixth in season 21 of the dance competition in 2015—her husband ultimately placed fourth—it was important for her to define her dynamic with partner Mark Ballas. And the same went for Carlos and his partner Witney Carson.
“I love Mark,” she emphasized. “We got along great, but if it was ever flirty, I’d just be like, ‘I don’t do that.’ I was a little mean, but it was only to set good boundaries and we figured it out and we ended up having a really great partnership.”
But Alexa—who shares kids Ocean, 7, Kingston, 5, and Rio, 3, with Carlos—also recognized that those boundaries weren’t the easiest for others on the show.
“I know it was really rocky for everybody because when we went on the show, we said, ‘Look, we’re a married couple,’” she recalled of their conversation. “‘You guys are our partners and we are so excited to team up with you, but that doesn’t mean we ditch our marriage and this becomes our No. 1. Our marriage is still first.’”
Despite trying to put parameters in place, the duo did face obstacles in their marriage during their time on the ABC competition show.
“We were still learning so much,” the Sleepover actress said. “Carlos was so jealous and battling his insecurities. I felt like I had to be there for him, so I just felt beat down. He didn’t do anything bad, but if you see your spouse not feeling good or feeling jealous, even though there was no reason he should have felt that back in the day, it took a toll on me.”
And part of that was Alexa feeling pulled in so many directions. As she recalled, “I just remember going home every night being so exhausted and being like ‘I can’t be what Mark needs me to be. I can’t be what Carlos needs to need me to be, Like I can’t be what the producers want me to be.’”
Despite the drama, she is still grateful for the experience.
“The show is so fun to watch, and it feels good,” she said. “I love the premise of it. It’s just the behind-the-scenes can be tough, but it was as difficult as it was fun because there were really, really high highs.”
While Alexa and Carlos shimmied off the dancefloor 12 seasons ago, keep reading to see who has dazzled with their routine this season on Dancing With the Stars.